Our little coffee conversation

Imagine we’re sitting at a coffee shop, catching up after a really long time. I haven’t exactly made the effort to keep in touch with you. I’m really not the sort who does. But you should know it’s not that I forgot about you. It’s just that I’d rather brief you up on my life since we met last while I sit facing you than over a phone call or through texts.

Anyway, distance always brings hearts closer and that’s why I have no problem catching up with you from where we left it last. It’s been a couple weeks I suppose. Nothing much has changed except for the fact that I’m currently on the brink of a self revelation. I’ve realized I get way too blown away by mesmerizing words and enchanting conversations, which is actually not the real problem. The real problem is when I get the time to ponder over those conversations and realize that I’ve just been obsessing about the person because I’ve really never met someone like that before. Someone who takes life so literally and tries to interpret every word, punctuation, tone and the emotion of whatever I say!

In the beginning it all seems wonderful! He let me know that I can understand whatever he says and that very few people can actually do that! Me being me, gets what? That’s right… BLOWN AWAY! He explained to me how well we’ve bonded in a short time and I, for some good reason seemed to agree! Well, yes there was definitely a bond! That bond made sure I knew what to say to him, how to say it and when exactly to say it. Brilliance of the adaptability character that I actually love showing off!

Yeah, I know, you’ve stopped sipping your coffee… it’s become really cold and mine has to! You’re waiting for me to get to the worst part, so I’ll do that, right after I’ve asked the waiter for a refill.

So, where was I? Right. The bond. Now, this ‘bond’ wasn’t the same for him. I never got understood when I said anything. Most of the time there was something or the other being misinterpreted and then began the saga of countless interrogations and explanations. “What did you mean when you said that?” or “You know, I don’t quite like what you said!” At first, I thought it’s me. Maybe I can’t communicate. But now I don’t think that’s the problem. When I felt that this person was so different that he would take life so literally and I could get blown away by whatever he said, I thought (and that was probably a little naïve of me) that I could do it too. I’d say whatever came to mind and I finally have someone sitting in front of me who’d take it in and would not judge me for saying it. But as always, I get blown away too far and finally hit a wall… BAMM!!

Yeah, well, laugh all you want. I hope you choke on your hot coffee!

Bottom line, I started talking to a guy, an acquaintance actually. I thought this guy’s different. He’s random and funny and that’s awesome! Above all, he’s a clear glass (at least that’s what he says). And when I tried to be the clear glass for him to see through, he just decided to make me a mirror instead and look at his own ‘clear’ reflection through it! Not exactly a bond there, is it?

Well, good timing! Coffee’s done. But I’m definitely up for another round! So, what’s new with you? 🙂

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Table for one, please!

I wonder at times what’s actually wrong – choosing to be alone, or being lonely, in itself. It’s a little confusing when I’m asked why I’m at a place all by myself… why not? I guess it’s the general tendency to connect absolutely irrelevant dots – “she’s alone, oh the poor thing… she might have had a bad break up” or “she must be depressed about something” or even “nobody might want to hang out with her, let’s go and talk to her so she might feel better…” seriously people… ever heard of the phrase “me time”?

Today’s Writing 101 assignment was to get inspired by a picture. When I scanned through the ones on Unsplash, I came across this picture of a single cup of coffee on a table.

photo-1426260193283-c4daed7c2024

I thought of the days I visit coffee shops or ambient lounges by myself and ask the staff for a “table for one”. Frequently visited spots greet me with a smile and an occasional bowl of complimentary snacks, while I sit down to a cup of hot coffee or a mug of beer, with a book in hand – either to read or to write. I don’t know if they do it ‘coz I’m a really nice person or because they feel I’m a lonely soul.

If ‘lonely’ is equal to being unwillingly alone, then that’s not me… But I choose to be by myself at times, most of the time actually. I love being at my own disposal, not dependent on another, doing what I like when I like and more than anything, not having to explain the myriad shades of my mind to anyone while I stare into space.

Yes, there are times when being alone is the last thing I want. For those days, there are a few special ones standing by to make sure I’m not alone.

But honestly, I don’t get the whole concept of “No one ever wants to be alone” it’s a really sweet gesture by the one who thinks about it but there’s always this need for me to clear my head, to understand stuff, to work, or to just freak out. Being by myself lets me appreciate the little differences made to my life.

From couching at home, to sitting at a coffee shop, I’m never the ‘alone’ that’s perceived by people around. It’s just about having the choice to believe that my life is not defined by the people I’m with but by what I am, whether it’s solitarily or socially.

We love hanging out with those select few people who we call friends. Well, I’m my friend and I know that no one could understand me better than myself. If spending time with someone who understands you, gives you the happiness much needed, then what’s so painfully different about me being the “lonely” one?

Cheers

<a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/me-time/”>Me Time</a>